While driving Tom to SFO airport:
Me: My personal trainer measured my body fat today. I have 22% body fat.
Tom: And I read somewhere that the body is 78% water, so ...
Tom: I dropped off my suitcase at your house on Friday morning. Lugging that suitcase all the way from Cupertino made me really thirsty, so I opened your fridge and found a Naked Juice.
Me: I have a Naked Juice in the fridge?
Tom: Yeah. Well, so I started drinking it, and it was really sour. But I drank half of it anyway. Then I looked at it and realized it was a month past the expiration date.
Tom: My stomach hurt for the next hour. I called Dad and he said I should've known better than to drink something from your fridge.