At lunch with Andrew.
Me: I told my mom that I may never find the right person to get married. But regardless, I still plan to have kids. When I'm 34, I'll either adopt or get artifically inseminated.
Andrew: You said that to your mom?
Me: Well, not the last part. I actually said, "I'll either adopt ... or I won't." She knew what I meant.
Andrew: What did your mom say?
Me: She stood there in silence for half a minute, then said, "I think you should have your own kid instead of adopting." Which implied she's okay with the out-of-wedlock part.
Andrew: Raising a kid by yourself is hard.
Me: I know. But falling in love is so unlikely! It's like winning the lottery! Come to think of it, childbirth is so difficult that it also seems impossible. If I didn't know that billions of women had already done it, and you described childbirth to me, I would say that it's impossible! It's like pushing a watermelon through a straw!
Andrew: [shocked laughter] ... But you want to do it, huh? You want the watermelon?
Me: I want the watermelon.