Friday, February 23, 2007

a poignant thing I just read

I was surfing the chinese web and came across a page of "38 sentences to my sweetheart". It was from a girl to her ex, saying that she still loves him and wishes him well with his new girlfriend, then confessing that she thinks about him all the time, how could he break his promise to always love her and never love another, blah blah typical heartbreak stuff.

I thought it was a little melodramatic.

But one of the guest comments on the page really struck me. It was the most poignant thing I read this week.



I also deeply loved someone, but he didn't love me, so we split up. Yes, I was the one who ended it. The breakup letter was written by me.

But, I was crying while writing, and he was grinning while reading.

I imagine this girl crying yet still possessing the strength to end things, rather than letting it drag on, and hanging on to scraps of affection. Very commanding of respect.


K said...

Sometimes you love someone so much, you would do anything for them, leave your home country, leave your established career, go through the hardship of immigration, work multiple jobs to support yourself. You know they wont do the same for you, they want to be with you, but they will do minimal effort on their part or move effort onto you. They wont leave you either.

You love them so much, you would go through all the hardship over and over again. What hurts most is that you look in their eyes and dont see the love flow from their soul like you feel for them. And no matter how hard you try you can't change how you feel. You struggle with your own heart and how you did not choose to love someone that much.

And when you argue and fight for more love, even plead for it... Theres always shallow excuses, or faint words. You threaten to leave, and you hear those words 'but I love you, I want to be with you'.. Those words you crave so much.

You are in a struggle with yourself yourself, your heart and your feelings.

Helpless in love, not helplessly in love, but helpless in your love and self sacrifice for another.

Its so hard to hurt yourself, to breakup with your love, to change yourself, to change your love.

To cut so deep and to walk away is the hardest thing.

And once you've done so much, invested so much, you choose to stay, because your love for someone will never die, it feels like all that you have. And above all the hope that their love for you will grow, is stronger than the courage to leave them.

Anonymous said...

"But, I was crying while writing, and he was grinning while reading."

That was very immature of the guy...

Did You Ever?

Did you ever love someone and know they didn't love you?
Did you ever feel like crying but wonder what it would do?
Did you ever look into her eyes and say a little prayer?
Did you ever look into her heart and wish you were there?
Did you ever see her walking with her head real low?
And whisper "God I love her, will she ever know?"
Did you ever wonder where she is at night, a thought that makes you blue?
Wondering who she could be with, wishing it was you?
Then you don't know what to do so you worry day and night.
You see my friend you'll always lose, it never turns out right.
Love is so fine but it hurts so much, the price you pay is so high.
If I had to choose love or death, I'd rather die.
So don't fall in love my friend, you'll hurt before it's through.
You see, my friend, I ought to know, I fell in love with you.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Grinning? What kind of guy stays with a girl he doesn't want?

Be not like the false-hearted men, who take pleasure ... so that they may be seen by men. Truly I say to you, They have received their reward.

AJ Arora said...

It's interesting that you say making a difficult decision that pushes someone to tears is commanding of respect.

As men we are brought up to think it would be pathetic to cry in that situation, and we should be decisive without remorse.

Shawn the Rock said...

It's a tiresome history~why people always make some shit like this?
I believe God will give everything what we need,thats it.

Angie said...

Very fitting for what I'm dealing with right now....wanting to be with someone who just doesn't seem to be all that interested in being with me...making myself move forward without him and leaving it in his hands to either keep up or get out of the way.

Love sucks.

ishkabubba said...

angie, that's why it's very important to have a close knit group of girl friends for support. also, guys who are good friends as well. then add to that mix a lover or two on the side until love finds you again. ;-)

Angie said...

Ishkabubba, I like the way you think. I need to work on ALL of that. :)

ishkabubba said...

angie, one more thing. treat yourself to a relaxing massage at a spa. also, a nice glass of red wine. my preference these days are malbecs from argentina. enjoy! ^^

Anonymous said...

Just remember, Friends: "It will all be ok when we're all dead!" --r-man