Friday, December 18, 2009

remembering

Years ago, someone dear to me became very ill. The situation deteriorated over months. One morning, standing in the ER after staying awake all night, I grew desperate. I vowed to myself and God and the Chinese heavens that if my relative recovered, I would be grateful for the rest of my days.

It was a time of clarity. All the skills I spent my life developing were suddenly useless, except communication abilities for interacting with doctors. Kindness from friends and strangers became priceless; money seemed nearly worthless by comparison. There were moments of great despair.

My relative recovered. For a while, I overflowed daily with gratitude.

The months and years went by. Just now, I saw an article that reminded me of my relative's illness, and I realized with shock that I haven't thought of my vow of gratitude in quite some time.

I've been feeling quite grateful in the past month, but not to the extent that I felt at that time. Back then, I felt overwhelmingly lucky just to be healthy, and to have the people I care about be alive and healthy.

I just sent myself FutureMe reminders for one and three years from now, to remember to stay grateful. Hopefully this blog post will remind me too.

3 comments:

Wes said...

I know, the need to make good on a promise slips away for me too.

Alwin said...

What a nice reminder for us to be thankful. Thanks for sharing!

Justin K said...

I had a siilar feeling today when I learnt that Brittany Murphy died. She's 32!

I guess there's a sick positive in the negativity that is being reported in the news... it gives you a reminder to count your blessings.