Monday, August 24, 2009

soulmates explained

You know how sometimes you meet someone and feel as though you're already familiar with them? You feel a kinship to them, even though you've spent very little time together. The chinese people call this 缘份.

My new theory is that this happens because the new person reminds you of an old friend, and you project all your understanding and affection for your friend onto the stranger. You may not realize the connection consciously, so your immediate affinity mystifies you.

Unfortunately, if the other person didn't have a friend in the past who is similar to you, then there can result in an imbalance. They might find it TMI that you are confiding in them.

Maybe all this soulmate business of people immediately recognizing their "other half" is actually because the soulmates reminds them of someone else they already know well.


ArC said...

I definitely think I 'bin' (as in hashing) my friends into a relatively small number of categories, yeah.

But yet, I'm not fully convinced by your theory. Not sure why.

writer said...

My father is apparently good at triggering this with people. This is odd, because he is not what you (well, I) would normally consider a highly charismatic or even outgoing individual, but for some reason these days people who meet him find it easy to feel a close sense of familiarity or kinship with him. When he met Kimberly's family in Pittsburgh at the wedding reception, many people remarked upon this.

I think this also happens if you read a ton of posts from someone's blog and then you meet them later in real life.

Jeremy said...

I don't really buy your theory as well, but I can't explain my opposition. It just doesn't sound right.

I do know that a soulmate is someone who gets you. One of my uncles tells a lot of really corny/stupid jokes. The only person to consistently laugh is his wife. She knows they're stupid, but laughs just the same.

Sathyaprakash Dhanabal said...

I believe, certain things in life should not be examined too much. this is one of it. if u start judging, u wont enjoy...

tourist.tam said...

Funny, I thought it was down to our body odour. But maybe not.

Mingjing said...

Doesn't being soulmate have to be a mutual experience? It would make no sense to say "I met my soulmate but s/he just thought I was off my rocker."

Niniane said...

I've heard people talk about unrequited soulmates. I think it's a vague term, so it's debatable whether it has to be mutual.

That sentence you used as an example doesn't violate my definition of soulmate.

Day said...

I have had this happen a few times.
What a nice thing.

It is usually a good internal feeling that some people may give to others and from my experience it is when two people meet who are in a certain “place” in life at that particular time.

The same emotional connection may not happen should you meet even 4 hours later in time.

I met one of my best friends that way back in 1999.

Though there is no romance the peaceful feeling in each other’s company is perfect.

Anonymous said...

Well explained theory, though I do not completely agree. I think that, in those cases, the connection is genuinely soul based. Sometimes the other is not as responsive because of the ages and depths of spiritual levels.