You know, you have this passion for writing. You compulsively write for at least an hour every day since you were twelve years old, in your journal and long emails to friends. You pore over a dozen books on plotlines and description. You spend hundreds of dollars on Stanford writing courses.
Then you look at any random yelp review and it's just as entertaining and well-written as your most prized creations.
Reply from my friend:
The Yelp review you quoted was editorially selected for wittiness. Yelp puts the most entertaining reviews on top (through a combination of algorithmic and editorial means).
Reply to the reply:
Good, good. I can go on living then.