amazon mystery

Last time I visited the library, I borrowed a book from the new arrivals section.



I tried to read it today, and it was horrible. I kept cringing from the writing and the unbelievable characters. I stopped after twenty pages.

Yet this book averages four stars on Amazon! How can this be? One review says:

"This book could have been alot better if it shaved off about 250 pages.

I wasn't too pleased with this one."

Yet the reviewer still gave three stars! I've lost some faith in Amazon reviews after this. Perhaps the author somehow tapped into a readership who is eager to please and reluctant to criticize.

gallows humor

This "Overheard in New York" installment is funny:

Hobo on subway to man in suit: Spare change? Anyone? Spare change for the homeless? You look like you worked for Lehman Brothers, you're excused.

--51st St

why are so many songs about love?

I was switching between radio stations yesterday, and every station was playing a love song. Half the songs are about how great it feels to be in love, and the other half are about the sorrows of losing that love.

How did it become a social standard that pop songs are all about love? I suppose the experience is more universal, as opposed to politics, where any song will alienate a portion of the population. Or songs about a particular line of work, which would bore people from other professions. Love appeals to all ages, from teenagers to seniors.

Regardless, there are so many other facets to life. Why aren't there more songs along the lines of "I'm worried about the health of my grandparents" or "I love my job" or "The global gloom-and-doom is a difficult thing"?

germans being funny

In the Google Munich office. I'm temporarily sitting in an office with two German engineers.

Me: [dialing a number into the phone] "Hello? Oh, I'm sorry. I got the wrong number."

Munich Googler #1: [overhearing] "Did you dial 7 to get to an outside line?"

Me: "Yes, but it didn't work. I'm trying to call this number: 4916..."

Munich Googler #1: "Replace 49 with 0. You are in Germany, so you don't need the top-level namespace."

Munich Googler #2: "Why don't you just say 'Don't dial the country code' like a normal person?"

Munich Googler #1: [confidently] "This is more understandable."

I thought it was cute.

Sarah Palin song

This is funny.

Also it's sweet how the woman keeps looking over at the guy.

endpoints

I'm in Europe this week, and I miss my friends back home. Luckily there is gmail-integrated IM.

Pellinore: also, i've been very sick.
niniane: awwww, i'm sorry that you're sick.
Pellinore: i am going to the hospital on tues for a lot of tests
niniane: what kind of illness?
niniane: what symptoms?
Pellinore: it's a long story... but something is wrong with my GI track... nobody really knows why
Pellinore: so they need to go in and take a look...
Pellinore: they're going to send in little cameras for one or both endpoints (that's what they call it)!!
Pellinore: i need to drink this shit tomorrow to completely clear my system for my tests on tuesday
niniane: endpoints! wow
niniane: what color is the drink?
niniane: how long have you been ill like this?
Pellinore: last week, i went to this new dermatologist about 3 random skin problems
Pellinore: he gave me an antibiotic... these pills were awful. they made me so so so sick
niniane: so this is a reaction to the pills?
Pellinore: yeah, that's the frustrating part
Pellinore: i'm not very good at listening to doctors...
niniane: it's because you rebel against authority :)
Pellinore: my grandfather's brothers were all doctors... growing up, i remember hearing them talk about things over dinner all the time and i always thought they were like car mechanics... or like us... just putting useless print statements to see what's going on...
niniane: yeah, why did you take the antibiotics then? :)
Pellinore: i thought i should try it.
Pellinore: i made the mistake of listening
Pellinore: and now i'm making a bigger mistake by letting them put cameras up and down my endpoints
Pellinore: what if the two cameras crash into each other!
Pellinore: what if they form a knot and they can't get them out!
Pellinore: i hope they're doing this one at a time.
niniane: why do they need to do two cameras
niniane: i guess it depends on the direction it's pointed
niniane: i hope they don't just wash it and use it in the other direction
Pellinore: :)
Pellinore: thanks for listening to my story
niniane: oh, it was great.
niniane: the endpoints, and camera collisions
niniane: it was just like work

photos of hotness

Omst took our mutual friend Lauren to the Google vegetable garden. When his back was turned, she picked a pepper.

Five of us (including Omst and Lauren) were scheduled to meet for dinner. Lauren decided that if anyone was late, their penalty was to eat the pepper.

Dan was late. Here he is, holding his punishment.



This is a video of him eating it.



On the subject of food pictures, I'm now addicted to yogurt. Fresh yogurt, not the cannister type. Last week, I had yogurt four days in a row, at Fraiche Yogurt in Palo Alto.

You cannot actually see the yogurt here, since it's covered with pineapple and dark chocolate shavings. But it's very good.



Another novelty food item I recently ate was winter melon soup, inside a big winter melon. In chinese fashion, the saran wrap was not removed from the melon. Have you ever gone to a chinese person's house and noticed that they kept the protective covering on their chairs or remote control? We're like that.



By the way, if you were wondering about the title of the post, it's because the pepper was hot.

i'll recreate encountering Gates McFadden in the Google bathroom

I am very excited today to see this article: Scientist: Holographic television to become reality:

Picture this: you've sat down for the Football World Cup final, or a long-awaited sequel to the "Sex and the City" movie and you're watching all the action unfold in 3-D on your coffee table.

...
The reason for renewed optimism in three-dimensional technology is a breakthrough in rewritable and erasable holographic systems made earlier this year by researchers at the University of Arizona.

I don't care about watching TV in 3-d. That's boring. But if we can get high-res 3-d projections, then we can write AI and get closer to making the Star Trek holodeck!

I will not have walked this earth in vain, if one day I can make software that emulates the Star Trek holodeck.



It might not happen until I'm seventy years old, and the touch aspect won't work and my holodecks would be immediately overtaken by porn. But I would still be happy.

This part of the article makes me skeptical:

The researchers produced displays that can be erased and rewritten in a matter of minutes.

To create television sets the images would need to be changing multiple times each second -- but Peyghambarian is very optimistic this can happen.

...
"It took us a while to make that first breakthrough, but as soon as you have the first element of it working the rest often comes more rapidly," he said. "What we are doing now is trying to make the model better. What we showed is just one color, what we are doing now is trying to use three colors. The original display was four inches by four inches and now we're going for something at least as big as a computer screen."

There are no more great barriers to overcome now, he said.

Really? Projecting a single color a few times per hour is not much harder than a high-resolution model at 24 frames per second? I guess if you say so...

Oh, and the best part: If we can have 3-d projections from a portable source which emanates audio, then...

holographic miniature pig

cumulus

Alipé sent me this link for New Virtual Earth with 3D Clouds.

Seeing my clouds in this video was like seeing an old friend.

overheard at dinner

Walking out from dinner on Monday, Dan and I passed a young couple.

Dan: "That was an interesting sentence to overhear."

Me: "What was it? I wasn't paying attention."

Dan: "She said, 'Don't just tell me, 'Do whatever you want.''"

Me: "So they were arguing?"

Dan: "Yeah. He thinks he's being flexible, by agreeing to whatever she wants to do. But what she really wants is for him to be an emotional participant in the latest crisis of the moment. A crisis that she probably manufactured in order to get a reaction from him."

Me: "That's quite the analysis."

Dan: [noises of humility]

Me: "We can be momentarily smug that each of us is not embroiled in this type of argument. For two months."

Dan: "Until those exact words are said to us?"

Me: "Right."

Dan: "In your case, you'd be the one saying them."

conversations about Caltech

Today Megan had me do this exercise:


I was not as graceful as the woman depicted above.

Megan: "Shoulders over your wrists! Raise your leg! You're not raising your leg high enough! Are you listening to what I'm saying?"

Me: [struggling] "This is hard."

Megan: "I know you can figure this out! You went to Caltech."

Me: [out of breath] "We did not learn this at Caltech."

...

A better example of the Caltech lifestyle happened during a conversation last month with my college friend C3. He has always been an avid video game player, and would disappear for weeks after the release of a Blizzard title.

Me: "So do you play World of Warcraft?"

C3: "I stayed away from it, since I figured that would mark the end of my corporeal existence."

I told this later to Ono, who said while laughing, "Note how he says it's not the end of his entire existence, since he'll still have an existence through WoW."

pretty

My friend made a very pretty room in Lively. It made me happy.

telling someone they've gotten fat

I'm impressed by this spiel for telling your spouse that they've gotten fat.

I’ve been worried lately because my dad, mom, grandfather, other blood relative, coworker, long time friend or acquaintance… died from a heart attack (or has been ill). I’ve been really thinking about it a lot lately. And I have been trying to come to grips with that for some time. Not because they died (or are ill), but because I know it could have been prevented. They were (pick one or some) overweight, didn’t get any exercise, smoked, drank, were depressed… and I keep asking myself why they chose not to do anything about it? And then I took a hard look at us. I’m wondering if we’re falling into that same rut of complacency. I’ve been reading about the fact that positive lifestyle changes can add years to our lives together. And not just that, but add MEANINGFUL years to our lives.

I think we need to change some things about how we are living, and I’d like your help figuring out what changes we can make. I’ve got some ideas, if you’d be willing to listen: “I think we both need to change what we’re eating. The fast food is convenient, but it’s killing us slowly. I’m willing to do more around the house so that we can make time to eat healthier.” (Dietary habits are key to weight loss)

“I’d also like us to commit to getting in better shape. We both need to get out there. I’m not saying we have to join a gym or be muscle heads. But I know that if we just started walking or playing more that we’d feel better physically and emotionally.”

“I’d also like us to get rid of the junk food in the house and stop buying it. Cheetos, ice cream sandwiches and snack cakes are things I feel we eat too much of. I’m not saying that once in a while is bad, but I think we eat too much of that stuff right now. And if it’s there, I know I’ll go grab it because it’s convenient. Can we work on replacing the junk with healthier alternatives?”

Close by looking deep into their eyes lovingly, and placing your hand on the back of their neck, draw them closer to you. It helps cement communication. Say softly: “Honey, we’re a ‘we’. I depend on you so much for strength and support, and I don’t think I can make these changes without you. I need you in this with me and to be part of the solution for both of us. Can we do this together? I’ll help you and you can help me.”

What do you think, gentle readers? Would you rather hear this, or something straightforward?

hand soaps.

Online soap shopping is challenging! First, you must decide the texture:

• moisturing
  
• deep cleansing
  
• gentle foam
  

and then the bombardment of aromas, without being able to smell them:

• cherry blossom
  
• japanese cherry blossom
  
• orange ginger
  
• wild honeysuckle
  
• sweet pea
  
• irresistible apple
  
• eucalyptus spearmint
  
• lavendar vanilla
  

But I had to get through it. I am having a soap issue.

I used Costco clear soap for four years. Then I visited a coworker's house, and it opened my eyes to how wonderful soap can be. I know now that soap doesn't have to be just a tool for fighting bacteria. It can be a source of joy and stress relief and energy, depending on the aroma.

Now it will be my turn to have great soap. My soaps will be so satisfying that when people need to go to the bathroom, they'll drive from their house to my house so that they can wash their hands with my soap afterwards.

funny LHC links

The LHC webcam.

http://hasthelhcdestroyedtheearth.com. It has an RSS feed.

A LHC photo that may shock you.

traffic spike

Over instant messenger.

niniane: did you wish sha-mayn happy bday?
alipé : yep
alipé : Facebook was down for a while early this morning.
alipé : probably due to the overwhelming volume of people wishing her happy birthday
niniane: lol

happy birthday Sha-mayn

The world is a better place with Sha-mayn.

not the first time someone got fired because of Steve Jobs

At a Mexican taqueria with my brother.

Me: "Did you hear about how Bloomberg accidentally published an obituary for Steve Jobs last week?"

Tom: "No!"

Me: "It was in the news. At a conference the other day, Steve Jobs said, 'The rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.'"

Tom: "That's a good one. Oh, I bet that Bloomberg reporter got fired."

Me: "You think so? Yeah, heads probably rolled."

Tom: "Someone ran into his office and said, 'In thirty seconds, prepare to write your own obituary!'"

House Bunny mysteries

Recently I watched "The House Bunny" with my brother. It's an entertaining movie.



The premise is that a playboy bunny gets kicked out of Hef's mansion, and becomes house mother of a geeky sorority. She gives them makeovers, and they teach her to value her smarts.

Here is the before picture of the sorority girls:


and the after photo:


If the movie genre isn't clear, here's another hint: one of the previews featured Richard Gere.

I liked the movie. It reminded me of Caltech (sorry, Beavers). However, there were several mysteries that are disturbing my enjoyment of the film. If you can concoct a reasonable hypothesis for any of them, please leave a comment.

Believable explanations only! No elaborate tales. Also no useless comments like "it's a movie" or "it's all made up".

1. How come the geeky sorority girls have such nice figures? I realize they're in waterbras and heels, but they still have unnaturally good material to start from. Maybe because they're 19 with the youthful metabolisms.

2. Where did they get the money for the makeovers and parties? Manicure / pedicures cost around $50. Hair extensions cost upward of $200. Is this coming from the university sorority budget?

3. How come Oliver gives Shelley (the playboy bunny) another chance even though he wants a smart upstanding woman (plus she lied to him)?

4. After the epiphany about embracing their true selves, why does Natalie still go for this guy who noticed her most when she pretended to be less knowledgeable (about the Aztecs)?

I hope we can resolve these mysteries, so that the path will be paved for House Bunny 2.

For sale: one filing cabinet

Over brunch at University Cafe.

RB: "Did you get my card?"

Me: "Oh, I haven't gone through my mail in a month. It takes so long to file the papers into my filing cabinet."

RB: "Why don't you just dump them into a shoe box?"

Me: "I file them into individual folders for bills, insurance, mortgage, etc."

RB: "How often do you go back to look something up?"

Me: "Almost never. Maybe once a year."

RB: "So you do frequent writes, and infrequent lookups. Why would you choose to pay the cost on write? Just dump everything into a box and then sort through it if you ever need to look for a particular item! You would never design a software system this way."

Me: [stunned into epiphany]