amusing exchanges from this weekend

On my laptop in Susan's living room, on Saturday night.

Susan: [emerging from the bathroom with wet hair] "Hey, get ready. We're going out at 7:30."

Me: "I don't know how you're planning to achieve that. It's 7:32 right now."

Susan: [cutely] <litany of curse words>

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Over instant messenger.

percyvale: [status message is lookatthisfuckinghipster]
niniane: I looked at that web site and it's kind of funny.
niniane: But not as good as hotchickswithdouchebags
percyvale: douche bags don't care they like the attention
percyvale: but hipsters
percyvale: it takes work to get into those skinny jeans and growing odd moustaches
percyvale: so they deserve their own category of site
niniane: are you a hipster? :)
percyvale: do i look like a hipster :P
percyvale: if i do don't answer

[I got distracted for several minutes. When I look back...]

Message sent at 7:06 PM.
percyvale: the polite thing would have been to answer

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Picking up my brother last night with my car:

Me: "Sorry I'm late! I was playing Starcraft with a few entrepeneurs."

Tom: "Did you win?"

Me: "No, I lost. When it was down to three people, the other two allied against me."

Tom: "Did you have fun?"

Me: "It was so fun! I was rusty though. I was like, 'What is this Queen's Nest? I think it's good...'"

Tom: "The fact that you even got to a Queen's Nest before the game ended means you're all a bunch of noobs."