Sitting inside Notre Dame, under a projector screen spanning the church:
Program Announcer: "This 60-minute movie will tell you about the history of our church. It is intended for young and old alike..."
Me: [poking Tom on shoulder] "Did you hear that? It appeals to both you and me."
Tom: "No, they didn't say yuppies. [pointing to door] You have to leave."
Tom: [talking about how he recently gained weight]
Me: "How can you look the same, but weigh so much more?"
Tom: "I must have gotten denser as I aged. Same body, more mass. Or rather, same volume, more ass."
At a cafe inside the Louvre, holding a book we brought from the States.
Tom: "By the way, I agree that the Pocket Louvre sucks. I looked up 'Venus de Milo' and all it said was 'The Venus de Milo was unearthed in 1820.'"
Me: "Yeah, it's terrible. Feel free to just throw it away."
Tom: "Being in the trash can of the real Louvre would be the greatest thing that's ever happened to that book! I'm going to take it out of the Louvre before I throw it out."