deploy jokes

Late at night, we needed to perform a small site maintenance.  US users are sleeping, but it's the middle of the day in Australia.

X: "People from Australia are on the site, and we need to do things to it!"

To our Australian engineer: "Can you tell them to stop using the site for a few minutes?"

Australian engineer: "Okay!"

X: "Email all@australia."

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On skype chatroom at midnight:

On-call engineer: "Okay is everyone ready to deploy?  9+5=13"  [Our deploy script requires the engineer to do a simple math problem.]

On-call engineer: "I mean, 8+5=13.  It's scary I got that wrong at first."

Me: "Have you stopped drinking at all between beer o'clock [Minted Friday happy-hour tradition] and now?"

On-call engineer: "Don't ask me questions you don't want to know the answer to."

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On skype chatroom:

On-call engineeer: "Oh web4, where art thou web4,
Deny thy code and refuse thy branch,
Or if thou wild not, be but sworn my Thursday
release XXXX branch"

Me: "You can't rhyme branch with branch!"