Exiting a thermal bath in Budapest, with college friends Eileen and Mike. Eileen is really good at making up songs, so I got the idea that we should invent a song about our time in Budapest.
Me: "What genre of song would it be? I think it should be about goulash."
Mike: "I suggest a rap."
Me: "Oh wow. That would be good, because I also want it to be a song about technology since we've been talking about the internet a lot. Fortunately, goulash rhymes with both bash and flash."
Mike: "Also cache."
Me: "Good one! Oh, and hash."
Mike: "Crash."
Me: "Wait, but it's pronounced 'goulash' (short a), not 'goulahsh' (long a). So it actually doesn't rhyme with any of these."
Mike: "What are you, British? Just say 'goulash' (long a)."
Me: "No, that's not right. The song is ruined."
(It's too bad, because later I also thought of "backslash" and "john nash").
I don't think there's any reason not to write a rap anyway, and just not mention goulash.
ReplyDeleteMost rappers create their own pronunciations of words any way...so go ahead and use "long a" version and run with it. We want to see what you come up with.
ReplyDeleteI am confused. Bash, hash, and cache are all pronounced with short a's just like you claim goulash should be. They would rhyme just fine.
ReplyDeleteDo you prefer your name pronounced with the long a or short a?
ReplyDeleteRap doesn't always require exact rhymes. You just need a catchy beat, a hook and a lot of "Uhn. Oh yeah. Wave your hands in the air. Just don't stop."
ReplyDeleteRandom words "goulash" does rhyme with:
ReplyDeletecosh (as in the hyperbolic cosine function)
frosh
kibosh
posh
quash
Add a few more, and you may yet be able to salvage your rap. (Maybe with alternating -ash and -osh line endings so all your earlier effort isn't wasted. :) )
Rapper 1:
ReplyDeleteI'm da big G, you can all suck squashes.
I got a fifty phat hos, who wears fancy panaches.
I can make it rain, please prepare your galoshes.
So get it right, yo, it's pronounced goulashes.
Rapper 2:
kill -9 yo ass, da' flash is back; to hyjack yo abstract fact...
I'll rehash yo cache with one bucket, fuckit, you'll crash, like a deadlocked disaster, check da master shard, it's pronounced goulash.
Chorus:
Some like goulosh, some like goulash; but when I'm Hungary, I just Google for cash.
lol at Alex's rap! The best line was "I'll rehash yo cache with one bucket".
ReplyDeleteThat is really creative, on par with Weird Al's "If I ever meet you, I'll ctrl-alt-delete you".
Also, using "shard" in place of "word" is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteUpon re-reading, I think you meant it as a single line, i.e. "master shard". I think "shard" should be on its own, as the first word to a chorus. The way people normally say "check it".
ReplyDeleteDog of Justice, I don't think "cosh" will work as well, since even you had to define it. So the rap song would have to work in the explanation "that's the hyperbolic cosine function" into the lyrics.
ReplyDeletere: Anonymous @ 2:43pm. My name is pronounced like "Vivian" with N's instead of V's.
ReplyDeleteI too think of what your friend was thinking..
ReplyDeleteit is Goulash with a long 'a'..
well it happens some of the times and then feel embarrased each time you recall those times..
Please, anything but rap...
ReplyDelete