i missed you, Cali

I got back yesterday (Sunday) to California. JTR gave me a ride from the airport directly to Seth's housewarming. Standing in a circle in the yard next to Seth's grill:

Friend #1: How was your work project while you were in Egypt?

Me: I don't know yet. I haven't checked my work email.

Friend #1: Maybe your team finished your product while you were gone, and launched it already.

Me: Well, that would be the best-case scenario.

Friend #2: [overhearing] Maybe not. What if the product wasn't ready to be launched? You'd open the New York Times tomorrow and it would say, "Google releases mysterious crappy product".

Me: [offended] It's not crappy even if it got released early!

Friend #2: In this hypothetical scenario.

Me: Anyway, that's not the style of the Times. They wouldn't say that. They'd say, "Google releases product; universally hailed as mysterious and crappy".

Friend #1: But that still wouldn't be all bad, because a launch is an accomplishment regardless.

Friend #2: Come on, not every launch is something to be proud of. What if you had worked on Microsoft Bob?

Friend #1: That's fine. I'd write the tell-all book: "Why It Should've Been A Good Idea, and Screw You All".