Randall trying to provoke

Dinner with my ex-roommate Yolanda, her boyfriend Randall, and my brother Tom. Randall cooked stewed beef, mashed potatoes (from raw potatoes!), and gravy.

Sipping champagne after dinner.

Randall: Did you two fight growing up? You seem to get along really well.

Tom: Not really. But my sister did give me a fear of heights.

Me: [looking down sheepishly]

Randall: How did that happen?

Tom: I was 3, and my family went to Carlsbad Caverns. My sister pretended she was going to throw me over the railing into the cavern.

Randall: Niniane!

Me: [chagrined] Yeah, it happened.

Randall: So which one of you did better in school?

Me: Tom.

Tom: [simultaneously] Niniane.

Me: He has the higher GPA.

Tom: Stanford has grade inflation though.

Randall: Which one of you does your Mom love more?

Tom: Definitely Niniane.

Me: Yeah, it's me. I think my dad loves Tom more, but his delta is less than my mom's delta.

Randall: Your mom loves you more, even after your recent argument?

Me: Oh! Good point.

Tom: Yeah, you've probably gone down in her mind. It's time for the rise of Tom!